You might be a redneck if 45

You might be a redneck if… You fish in your above-ground pool. . . and catch something. When a sign that says “Say No To Crack!” reminds you to pull up your jeans. Your beer can collection is considered a tourist attraction in your home town. Getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck. Your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they’ve got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock. You dated your daddy’s current wife in high school. You’re moved to tears every time you hear Dolly Parton singing “I Will Always Love You”. You grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item. Your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center. The most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection