Women seeking men

“WOMEN SEEKING MEN” Classifieds 40-ish means: 48 Adventurer means: Has had more partners than you ever will Affectionate means: Possessive Artist means: Unreliable Average looking means: You figure this one out Beautiful means: Pathological liar Commitment-minded means: Pick out curtains, now! Communication important means: Just try to get a word in edgewise Contagious Smile means: Bring your penicillin Educated means: College dropout Emotionally Secure means: Medicated Employed means: Has part-time job stuffing envelopes at home Enjoys art and opera means: Snob Enjoys Nature means: Bring your own granola Exotic Beauty means: Would frighten a Martian Financially Secure means: One paycheck from the street Free spirit means: Substance abuser Friendship first means: Trying to live down reputation as slut Fun means: Annoying Gentle means: Comatose Good Listener means: Hard to pull a word from her Humorous means: Caustic Intuitive means: Your opinion doesn’t count In Transition means: Needs new sugar-daddy to pay the bills Light drinker means: Lush Looks younger means: If viewed from far away in bad light Loves Travel means: If you’re paying Loves Animals means: Cat lady Non-traditional means: Ex-husband lives in the basement Open-minded means: Desperate Outgoing means: Loud Passionate means: Loud Poet means: Depressive Schizophrenic Redhead means: Shops on the Clairol aisle Reliable means: Frumpy Reubenesque means: You can figure this one out Romantic means: Looks better by candle light Self-employed means: Jobless Smart means: Insipid Special means: Rode the small schoolbus w/ tinted windows Spiritual means: Involved with a cult Stable means: Boring Tall, thin means: Anorexic Tan means: Wrinkled Wants Soulmate means: One step away from stalking Widow Nagged means: first husband to death Writer means: Pompous Young at heart means: How about the rest