You might be a reneck if… You live close enough to town to get garbage service, but don’t use it because they won’t come down your driveway to get it. The fellows on the big garbage moving equipment recoginze your wife…. and wave to her. Your wife picks thru your garbage cans looking for any [...]
You might be a reneck if… The neighborhood dogs are afraid to come around your house because the fowl are big enough to hurt them. You have ever had to climb up on the roof of an out building to get down any fowl that was frozen to the roof. You have ever worried more [...]
You might be a reneck if… The make, model, and license plate number of your truck are obscured by a layer of mud. You have got more bumper stickers than children. Your wife has ever taken two pairs of shoes to a funeral: one pair to trudge thru the wet Georgia red clay between the [...]
You might be a redneck if… Your best coat is a black and red checkered. You put your Christmas lights up 2 weeks after taking them down. You consider duct tape and tarp straps necessities for auto body repair. You raise the confederate flag in the bed of your truck whenever you go for a [...]
You might be a redneck if… You think you are an entrepreneur because of the “Dirt for Sale” sign in the front yard. You’re still scalping tickets after the concert is over. You don’t think Jeff’s jokes are funny. Your house has a kickstand. You drive around a parking lot for fun. Your girlfriend has [...]
You might be a redneck if… You list your parole officer as a reference. There are more fish on your wall than pictures. Motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming. There are more dishes in your sink than in your cabinets. You think a turtleneck is a key ingredient in soup. [...]
You might be a redneck if… Taking a dip has nothing to do with water. There are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog. You take a fishing pole to Sea World. The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car. You’ve ever filled your deer tag [...]
Backup – What you do when you sight a skunk in the woods. Bar code – Them’s the fight’n rules down da local tavern. Bug – The reason you is a giv’n for calling in sick. Byte – What yer pit bull dun to cusin Jethro. Cache – Needed when you go to da store. [...]
You might be a redneck if… You think cur is a breed of dog. People hear your car long before they see it. Your four-year-old is a member of the NRA. Your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids. Your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels. Your wife has ever [...]
You might be a redneck if… You think Old Yeller is a movie about your brother’s tooth. You watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips. Your secret family recipe is illegal. Your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve. Your baby’s favorite teething ring is the garden hose in the yard. Your coat-of-arms features [...]
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