Q: Why are blondes hurt by peoples words? A: Because people keep hitting them with dictionaries. Q: Why can’t blondes put in light bulbs? A: They keep breaking them with the hammers. Q: What is a cool refreshing drink for a blonde? A: Perri-air. Q: Did you hear about the blonde coyote? A: Got stuck [...]
Q: What do you get if you put 100 lawyers in your basement? A: A whine cellar. Q: What do you call a lawyer gone bad? A: Your honor. Q: What do you call a judge gone bad? A: Senator. Q: Have you heard about the lawyers? word processor? A: No matter what font you [...]
Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? A: So she wouldn’t wake up the sleeping pills. Q: Why did the blonde try and steal a police car? A: She saw “911″ on the back and thought it was a Porsche. Q: Why did the blonde scale the glass wall? A: To see [...]
Q: How can you tell a lawyer is lying? A: Other lawyers look interested. Q: Why should lawyers wear lots of sunscreen when vacationing at a beach resort? A: Because they’re used to doing all of their lying indoors. Q: What happened to the banker who went to law school? A: Now she’s a loan [...]
Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence. Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? A: Pull the pin and throw it back. Q: What does a blond and a beer bottle have in common? A: They’re both empty from [...]
Biblical Questions and Answers Q. Who was the greatest financieer in the Bible? A. Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation. Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible? A. Pharaoh’s daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet. Q. [...]
Q: How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus? A: Never enough. Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: How many can you afford? Q: Did you hear about the new microwave lawyer? A: You spend eight minutes in his office and get billed as if you’d [...]
Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vulture? A: Lawyers accumulate frequent flyer points. Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a terrorist? A: You can negotiate with a terrorist. Q: What’s the difference between a bankrupt attorney and a pigeon? A: The pigeon can still make a deposit on a Mercedes. [...]
Q: When attorneys die, why do they bury them 600 feet underground? A: Because deep down, they’re really nice guys. Q: If you drop a snake and an attorney off the Empire State Building, which one hits first? A: Who cares? Q: How can you tell the difference between a dead skunk and a dead [...]
Q: What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in wet cement?A: Not enough cement.Q: Did you hear they just released a new Barbie doll called “Divorced Barbie”? A: Yeah, it comes with half of Ken’s things and alimony. Q: What’s the problem with lawyer jokes? A: Lawyer’s don’t think they’re [...]
Daily Joke Updates Sent To Your Email
(I hate spam, too! I will never share your email address with anyone. Period. Privacy Policy