Q: A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces. A: “Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces.” Q: What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home? A: She moved. Q: What’s five miles long and [...]
Tag Archives: blondes
Question and answer blond jokes
Q: How do you plant dope? A: Bury a blonde. Q: How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? A: Wave to her. Q: How do you get a blondes eyes to twinkle? A: Shine a torch in her ears. Q: How do you make a blonde’s eyes light up? A: Shine [...]
Question and answer blond jokes
Q: Why do Blondes wear earmuffs? A: To avoid the draft. Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because the can said “concentrate” on it. Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? A: Tell her a joke on Wednesday. Q: What is [...]
Unlocking your car
Two blondes were recently observed in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. Here is their dialogue: Blonde One: I can’t seem to get this door unlocked! Blonde Two: Well, you’d better hurry up and try harder! it’s starting to rain, and the top is down!
Blonde 911 Call Lightbulb Moment
Three blondes are attempting to change a light bulb. One of them decides to call 911: Blonde: We need help. We’re three blondes changing a light bulb. Operator: Hmmmmm. You put in a fresh bulb? Blonde: Yes. Operator: The power in the house in on? Blonde: Of course. Operator: And the switch is on? Blonde: [...]
Two Blondes take a Short Trip to Disney
Two blondes had driven across the country to see Disney World in Florida. As they approached it and got onto the final stretch of highway, they saw a sign saying “Disney World Left!” After thinking for a minute, the driver blonde said “Oh well!” and started driving back home.
One wish to each
Three blondes were walking through the desert when they found a magic genie’s lamp. After rubbing the lamp to make the genie appear, he said, “I will grant three wishes, one for each of you.” The first said, “I wish I were smarter.” So, she became a redhead. The second blonde said, “I wish I [...]
Don’t give us a bad name
There was a blonde driving down the road listening to the radio. The announcer was telling blonde joke after blonde joke until the blonde was so mad that she turned her radio off. A mile down the road, she saw another blonde out in a corn field in a boat rowing. The blonde stopped her [...]
Rowing Your Boat
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat. The driver blonde turned to her friend and said “You know – it’s blondes like that that give us a bad name!” To this, the other blonde replies “I [...]
I Want to Buy That
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn’t serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, [...]



