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The Computer Funnies
April 18, 2011 – 6:00 am
• My sister opened a computer store in Hawaii.
- She sells C Shells by the seashore.
Q: What does a proud computer call his little son?
A: A microchip off the old block.
Q: What happens if you cross a midget and a computer?
A: You get a short circuit.
Supermarket Stupid Mamma
April 15, 2011 – 6:00 am
Yo Mamma so stupid, she got locked in a supermarket and starved to death!!!
Two Nuns Smoking A Cigarette
April 14, 2011 – 6:00 am
Two Nuns were in the back of the convent smoking a cigarette, when one said,
‘It’s bad enough that we have to sneak out here to smoke, but it really is a problem getting rid of the butts so that Mother Superior doesn’t find them.’
The second Nun said, ‘I’ve found a marvelous invention called a condom which works really well for this problem. You just open the packet up, take out the condom, and put the cigarette butt in, roll it up, and dispose of it all later.’
The first Nun was quite impressed and asked where she could find them.
‘You get them at a chemist, sister. Just go and ask the pharmacist for them.’
The next day the good Sister went to the chemist and walked up to the counter.
‘Good morning, Sister,’ the chemist said, ‘what can I do for you today?’
‘I’d like some condoms please,’ said the nun.
The chemist was a little taken aback, but recovered soon enough and asked,
‘How many boxes would you like? There are 12 to a box.’
‘I’ll take six boxes. That should last about a week,’ said the Nun.
The pharmacist was truly flabbergasted by this time and was almost afraid to ask any more questions. But his professionalism prevailed and he asked in a clear voice.
‘Sister, what size condoms would you like? We have large, extra-large, and the big liar size.’
The Sister thought for a minute and finally said:
‘I’m not certain, perhaps you could recommend a good size for a Camel?’
You might be a redneck if 72
April 13, 2011 – 6:00 am
You might be a redneck if…
- You can identify your friends by the sound of their muffler.
- You think OFF is a fine smelling cologne.
- You put a Clapper on your headlights.
- You need a dictionary to spell your name.
- You don’t change your socks until the first pair rots off.
- People ask your wife when her baby’s due and she’s not pregnant.
- Your driveway is two tire tracks with grass growing down the middle.
- You’ve ever invited friends over to show off what’s left of the squirrel that you shot with your deer gun.
- You have more tires in your yard than on your trucks.
- The idea for the Budweiser frogs came from listening to you and your friends trying to read the label on the bottle.
Theres a smart blonde, tooth fairy, honest politician, and a leprechaun.
April 12, 2011 – 6:00 am
Theres a smart blonde, tooth fairy, honest politician, and a leprechaun. They all spot a $100 bill. Who gets it? No one they are all imaginary creatures.



