A group of Americans was touring Ireland. One of the women in the group was a real curmudgeon, constantly complaining. The bus seats are uncomfortable the food is terrible It’s too hot, It’s too cold & the accommodations are awful. The group arrived at the site of the famous Blarney Stone. “Good luck will be [...]
A bunch of girls had become upset at an anthropology professor who had a knack of offending women. They decided the next time he did something offensive, they would all stand up and walk out of his class. Sure enough, at the very next class meeting while discussing a tribe of African natives. The professor [...]
A blind man interviews for a job as a quality controller at the local wood mill. The manager calls the blind man into his office and asks him how he expects to do this job since he is blind. The blind man replied he would do it by smell. The manager decides to test him [...]
A wife comes home and says to her husband, “I am moving to Las Vegas – I hear you can get $400 for sex”. The husband runs to the bedroom, starts packing his bags and says “I’m coming along to see this!” “Why?” asks the wife, “Why would you come to Las Vegas with me?” [...]
“The 50th Anniversary” An elderly couple decide to celebrate their fiftieth anniversary by reliving their honeymoon. They get a reservation for the honeymoon suite in the same hotel at the same resort. After waking the next morning to a room service breakfast they begin eating in the nude. The wife says “Oh Harold! This is [...]
A glimpse into our future… ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ “Gray Hair” A senior citizen decided to visit the social security office to sign up for his benefits. Upon his arrival the clerk asked for proof of his age. When he reached for his wallet the embarrassed man realized he had left it home. After explaining his problem to [...]
Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Ask your Mom.
Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in. And that hooker I met at the AIDS clinic said you were a nice guy. Hey, you must’ve been doin’ about 125mph to keep up with me! Good job! That uniform makes your ass look really big. Excuse me. Is “stick up” hyphenated? I [...]
One day three midgets were sitting around the table drinking tea and having crumpets. The first midget says to the other two, “You know, I think I have the smallest hands in the world.” He continues, “and I think I should go down the Guiness Book or World Records and try to get in the [...]
A little boy just got a brand new bike for Christmas and was riding down it down the street. He stopped at a red light next to a Police Officer on a horse. The Police Officer asked the boy “Did Santa bring you that new bike?” the boy replied “Yes!” “It looks like Santa forgot [...]
Daily Joke Updates Sent To Your Email
(I hate spam, too! I will never share your email address with anyone. Period. Privacy Policy