A list of redneck computer terms

Backup – What you do when you sight a skunk in the woods. Bar code – Them’s the fight’n rules down da local tavern. Bug – The reason you is a giv’n for calling in sick. Byte – What yer pit bull dun to cusin Jethro. Cache – Needed when you go to da store. Chip – Yer cusin’s uncle’s mother’s boyfriend’s name. Terminal – Time to call da undertaker. Crash – When you go to Junior’s party uninvited. Digital – The art of counting on your fingers. Diskette – A female Disco dancer. Hacker – Uncle Leroy after thirty years of smoking. Hardcopy – Picture looked at when selecting tattoos. Internet – Where cafeteria workers put their hair. Keyboard – Where you hang the keys to the John Deere. Mac – Big Bob’s favorite fast food. Megahertz – How your head feels after seventeen beers. Modem – What ya did when the grass and weeds got too tall. Mouse pad – Where Mickey and Minnie live. Network – Scoop’n up a big fish before it breaks the line. Online – Where to stay when taking the sobriety test. Rom – Where the pope lives. Screen – Helps keep the skeeters off the porch. Serial port – A red wine you drink with breakfast. Superconductor – Amtrak’s Employee of the year. Scsi – What you call your week-old underwear.